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We are all members of this collective community living on Earth, and we all need to start being honest with ourselves.What does it mean to be uncomfortable about interracial dating in 2014? Why are so many people advocating a "stay with your own race" mentality?

Try as I might to suppress the reaction, I experience black men's choice of white women as a personal rejection of the group in which I am a part, of African American women as a whole, who have always been devalued in this society.

As a young woman of color, I can attest to the fact that many people in this world feel it is their duty — no, their God-given right — to decide what is best for me, and especially whom is best for me to date.

For instance, I felt the need to defend my relationships to my mother who, like Baker’s mother, wondered when her daughter would bring home someone who looked more Michael B. My mother will resent me for saying this, but I know there is a part of her that wanted to see me settle down with someone black, someone who looked like me.

I had dated a few guys before, all assholes, and I didn’t think many people would show interest in me.

I looked down at my fingertips, stained deep mocha from my foundation, and felt self-conscious.

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